Today I am back in Hutchinson after coming for Seth Miggiani’s funeral which was yesterday. It was very good experience for me. I can honestly say, if I can say it without sounding stupid, that it was one of the “best” funerals I have ever attended. See, the whole experience was strange from the start. All this traumatic and crazy stuff happened over the weekend while I was here last time, and the whole thing had this unresolved feel to it. Attending this funeral brought resolution to it for me. God is good. Very good. But I still don’t understand Him.
Anyway, today I had a nice talk with my good friend Danny. Danny is a great guy and feels very similar to how I feel about certain things. Actually, we are quite different in some ways but it’s nice to talk to someone who understands just how I feel about a certain thing: Music. We headed out to a Metropolitan coffee shop and I am typing this while he gets his drink. Before we got here we talked about how music affects us. Both of us feel very passionately about music. We talked about how it grabs something deep inside our souls, and attaches itself to us in ways that even we can’t really explain. We just know that it does.
What I mean by this is. For some of us, music is a language that we identify with almost better than real conversation. With this in mind, realize that sometimes we do some very strange things. Take this as an example:
If I am with friends at a store or restaurant, I will sometimes here a song playing in the background. It might be so faint that other people tune it out completely–but I can’t–especially if it’s a song I really like. (That’s becoming a little rarer these days because most of the stuff they play in the average public venue is so crappy that it’s depressing.) Often, I can’t tune it out even if I don’t like it.
Usually, what happens next, is something that even I would call strange. If it is music that I love very much, it is all I can do to to keep myself from telling the rest of my friends to shut up so I can listen to the song. I know it sounds really dumb, but this is something that I constantly struggle to control. Often I try to bear it by singing the song softly to myself and doing my best to tune out the conversation.
Take last night for example: some good friends were at our house late for a sort of party and we were watching some video clips of some music being performed by some of our favorite musicians. Occasionally, throughout the course of the videos, someone would try to talk to someone else about something completely unrelated to the music. I wanted to tell them to shut up and listen to the music.
One of my good friends at the party was visiting for the weekend and had been at our place before. My dad came walking through at one point and wanted to talk to him. It felt almost criminal to me. He was messing up the music! “SILENCE! PLEASE!” Was the general idea of what went through my mind.
I couldn’t really say anything because I knew that I would sound like a complete jerk if I told him to be quiet. (And I would have been.) But, no exaggeration, I was just about going crazy with frustration. I wanted to yell. I got over it a short time later, if you wonder.
Honestly, I know this sounds horrible. You’re probably thinking, “How could someone think music more important than people?” It may be a lame copout, but it’s tough to explain to someone who doesn’t feel this way when they hear one of their favorite songs and the people around them are ruining it.
Just so you know, when we act like we’re mad at you for messing up the music, it’s because we just can’t help it. We love you and we value your friendship. It just sets us off like nothing else when our music is being polluted by other noise. Love us for who we are. We all have our little ways that don’t make sense. God put different kinds of people in the world because it makes it more interesting.
God made us this way and He probably gave you some peculiarities that I don’t understand. Just please try to understand us, and don’t talk a lot when our music is playing. We promise we won’t hurt you. . . much.